Jackball Advice: Keep that Career or Enjoy a Corporate C--k-Block

Oh, sure you f-cked up, you Jackball, but fear not, there is still hope.


I've recently come to find out, while freezing my a-- off in a coffee house (that has been rated favorite coffee house in town for the last century, it would seem, by vacationing Inuit), that in a down economy when you're in a career that, as it turned out, is not as good as it was pitched to you when you started it 15 years ago, it's possible to find a way for someone else to subsidize your education so that you can go back to school.

This is win-win right??? Going back to college is the best way to get drunk, get laid, and ostensibly, to get paid more for that job that you hate to do. The challenge of the whole thing is to get the someone else to pay for it. 

So here's what I've found out: It would seem that there are a number of programs around that will allow you to get an Master's, MBA, JD, etc., with the following caveats:

• You have to go to the school the Corporate b--tards tell you to, usually in the hometown of the corporate office of the company that's footing the bill (usually full tuition plus small monthly STIPEND)
• You have to work a PAID internship for 10-15 hours per week (holy, s--t
• You have to actually COMMIT to working for them for 2 years after you get the degree

Now I ask you, dear reader, would you want to go to school for free while earning a degree, while getting a job (and stipend) to help you through it, and then you're guaranteed a job afterward?

To quote jackball (and House Majority Leader-Elect) John Boehner, "HELL NO"!! 

That would totally SUCK. That would take all of the fear and loathing out of school. That would completely eliminate all that uncertainty about how you're going to pay off all of those loans which would, in turn, cause you NOT to put your head in the sand and live in a fantasy world of co-eds and free beer, but rather focus on studying and actually attempt to finish as soon as possible with the best education you can get before those corporate fat cats change their damn minds.


That's why I say it's a coporate c--k-block!!!


Well, there's always the other option - work your a-- off to find a job by taking meetings with an HR rep in an ice cold coffee house (no, I don't mean they're a coffee house that serves ice coffee. I mean, they do, but that's not the point a--hole!!) which might lead to another 10 or so years of work, OR you could go back to school, work your a-- off and then try to not be in a career that will shrivel up and die before anyone realizes that you're an old jackball who hasn't any real skills.



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